Divorce is an overwhelming and confusing time for everyone in the family. When working out the details of your split, it is normal not to know how to handle telling your children. You do not want to hurt them or leave them feeling abandoned by you or your spouse.
According to CNN, divorce can be traumatizing for the kids involved, but it does not have to be. Children do not have to process the loss and separation alone with the right approach.
Approach the conversations gently
No matter who you think your children act closest to, they identify with both parents. If you approach your child with the wrongs your ex committed, they may feel like you see them in the same light or worry that they have the same traits. Be gentle in explaining that you two want to divorce. Do not dwell on all of the changes, but reassure your kids on what will stay the same.
Be a role model for your children
Try to think about the divorce from your children’s point of view. How do they see you and your spouse? If you and your ex fight all of the time or cannot cope healthily, how can you expect your kids to? Do not let the children see the fighting and never bring your feelings about your spouse into the conversation.
Treat the other parent with mutual respect and remind your children that the two of you can still come together for their benefit.
Sometimes, children may need extra help following a divorce. Your kids may need a third party, like a therapist, to talk to about their feelings. Providing resources to your children helps them navigate the split.