How to inform children about your upcoming divorce

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How to inform children about your upcoming divorce
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Last Modified on Oct 15, 2025

If you and your spouse decide to end your marriage, you may be dreading telling your children. Understandably, this is one of the toughest conversations you may have with them, but it is an important one to have.

Divorce is stressful for children, but if you approach it in a certain way, most children have an easier time with the transition.

Strategies to tell the children

According to Psychology Today, you and your spouse should tell your children together to show a united front. Even if you are not getting along with your spouse, you need to demonstrate that no matter what, you are both still their parents and that you both love them and are there for them. Plan what you are going to say and choose a day and time that allow for ample questions and explanations. If you are having an extremely difficult time with your spouse, you may want to engage the help of a therapist or mediator.

Although you want to be honest as to why the divorce is happening, you do not need to provide details. You should also avoid blaming one another. Explain what you know as best as possible, such as who will be moving out, if the kids will need to change schools and things that will remain the same.

Acknowledge different emotions

According to Today’s Parent, your children will probably react differently to the news, depending on their ages and temperaments. Some may react right away, while others may shut down and come to you later with questions. Acknowledge how they are feeling and answer their questions the best you can. The main points to get across are that the divorce is not their fault and that you both still love them, even though you will be living apart.

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